Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize
