Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
