I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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