And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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