we have pet lesbian snakes
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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