Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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