She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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