You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
