why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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