I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
