oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Vodka?
Forever.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Someone signed my nipple.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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