So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
