Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
