he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
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Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
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These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
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