thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
