I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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