whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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