Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
