Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
