it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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