we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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