Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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