My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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