youre lurking in front of me
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
foreskin is a definite game changer
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
