I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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