she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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