Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
