They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
