Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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