you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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