Having a random hookup so left but love u
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize
