Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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