OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
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