do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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