I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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