That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
