if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
