from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
