Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
You can't just leave with hair like that
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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