they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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