sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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