please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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