Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
