Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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