Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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