How'd it feel making her break her religion?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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