nut hugger
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I think a kid would responsible me up
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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