He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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