Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
