it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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