So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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