Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
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She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
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Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.